Title: Genderbender
Author: AlejandraDD
Rating: PG-13 (Yes, it's safe for mostly everybody to read)
Summary: Lex has a wish granted and turns into a 15-year-old girl. Don't ask me why, I just felt like writing it.
Disclaimer: If Clark and Lex were mine, I'd be the center of a Clex sandwich. You don't see that happening, do you?
Notes: A really really really really late entry for Livia's "Xfiles Titles Challenge", I just dared to post it now. The first half was beta'ed by the lovely Fabrisse, the second half is totally un-beta'ed, so all the suckitude belongs to me.
Excuse: if Lex seems a bit out of character: that's what teenagegirl hormones'll do to you!
Another excuse: It's supposed to be stupid!
All feedback welcomed!

Clark was looking for something in the fridge when the doorbell rang. He heard Martha open the door, and a sweet female voice saying "Hi". Clark closed the fridge and paid attention to that cute 15-year-old girl, ten feet away from him, talking to his mother.

"Hi" said Martha. "How can I help you?"

"I need to talk to Clark"

"Who are you?"

"I'm L... Lex's cousin... Sandi."

"I didn't know Lex had cousins"

"I'm a distant cousin." Sandi seemed nervous "May I speak to Clark, please?"

"He's right there."

Clark was intrigued, who was this mysterious woman?

"Hi" said Clark.

"Um... Clark, can we go somewhere private?"

"Sure, follow me"

Sandi followed Clark to the barn, where they sat on some hay bales. There was something odd with her clothes, they seemed... well... big.

"So... did Lex told you to talk to me? Why?"

"Clark, I'm..." She just looked down and sighed.

"What?" Clark looked puzzled.

"You're never going to believe me," she said.

Clark laughed at that. "Try me."

"Clark, I'm not Lex's cousin, I'm Lex."

That just didn't make sense at all. "Ehhh?" Clark puffed, since the words weren't forming in his head.

"Just... I don't know... something happened to me."

No, this couldn't be."This can't be... is this some sort of joke? Did Lex put you on to this?"

The girl sighed loudly. "It's not a joke, nobody put me on to this and I don't know what to do."

"So you're Lex..."

"Yeah"

"...but you look like a 15-year-old girl."

"Yes."

"May I ask why?"

"How could I know?"

"Well, I wasn't there when it happened, you did, so just tell me the story already."

"There is no story. I just woke up this way."

"Something must've happened--"

"You think?"

Ouch, an acid remark that Clark let slide, just trying to move on.

"Well, what did you do yesterday, then?"

"I know what are you asking, but no, I wasn't around any meteor rocks, but --" She stopped talking, and her eyes were looking straight to the floor.

"But what? If you don't tell me, then I can't help you." Clark touched her chin lightly, and she made eye contact again.

"I kind of... made a wish."

"A --" Clark couldn't hold back a laugh, "A wish? Why did you make a wish?"

"Well, there was this shooting star and I just, you know, made a wish. For the heck of it. I didn't actually believe that it was going to come true, I'm a scientist, you know."

"And you wished this?"

"Dammit, Clark, you're not helping me at all!"

"So, what did you wish, then?"

"To be someone else," she said with a lot of conviction in her voice. "I just wanted --" her eyes turned teary and her voice broke "-- to be someone else."

Clark didn't know what to do, this was... weirder than weird. "Be careful of what you wish for," Clark said to himself but the words came out of his mouth very softly. "We'll find a way to get you back to normal, I promise." Didn't his father used to say something about making promises that you can't keep?

She shook her head in disbelief, looked at him, and grimaced in a way that Clark recognized as Lex's. He took his time to look at this person, it was and it was not Lex at the same time. She had Lex's eyes, but that was about it. Now that he knew what he was dealing with, he recognized the oversized sweatshirt and jogging pants the girl was wearing: they were Lex's. She had brown hair 'til her shoulders, her eyebrows were not plucked, yet that didn't matter because they were framing her face in a nice way, she wasn't wearing make up for the obvious reasons, and the freshness of the face and the fullness of the lips almost made Clark forget what he was doing. What was he doing? Right, trying to help Lex. "So, if it happened once, it can happen twice. Tonight we'll watch the sky, find another shooting star and you'll wish to get back to normal, and problem solved." It sounded as an order. "First of all, today's Saturday, so nobody will miss you until Monday, there's no problem there."

"What if I'm still like this on Monday?"

"You won't." Why? Why was he so sure? He couldn't explain that to himself. "Come on, we'll make up a stupid story so my mom will let you spend the weekend here." He thought about telling his mother the truth, as he always did, but he felt like he had to protect Lex. He chose him to confide this, but he was sure that Lex wouldn't let anyone else in it. Maybe this would be over too soon to even worry about it.

"Like what?"

"I heard you telling her your name was Sandi, right?"

"Yes, that's... that's another short form for Alexander, I guess I'm not that creative."

"I like it. So... you're Lex's cousin, and you came to visit from... let's say Chicago. You met with Lex who had to leave town for some sort of business emergency, told you to spend the weekend in the Castle anyway, and to talk to me if you needed anything, but you don't wanna stay in that huge castle all by yourself."

She nodded. "I can handle that story."

In the kitchen, Clark announced that Sandi was staying for lunch; Martha didn't seem to have a problem with that. "Clark, did you know that Lex had a cousin?"

Fortunately, Lex jumped in and answered the question: "He didn't mention me? I met Clark briefly at Lex's castle once." Maybe that way, Clark's mom wouldn't think he was hanging with a total stranger.

"So, Sandi, what brings you to Smallville on this particular occasion?"

"I came to spend the weekend with Lex, but that won't be happening."

"What? Why?"

"Lex had some emergency meeting who knows where. Now I'm stuck here, and I'll have to spend the whole weekend alone."

"Alone in that creepy castle?"

"Creepy?" Sandi was hurt by that comment, but Clark saw the idea forming in her eyes. "Yes, you could say that the Castle is creepy, and the servants..." she shuddered "...there's that Enrique guy who's always sucking those lollipops... yes, creepy is the word." She calmly took a sip of her glass. "I love Smallville, but I wish I could spend my weekend anywhere but in that castle."

"Hey, why don't you crash here?" That was Clark's best attempt of sounding spontaneous. "Can she, mom?"

"Sure, why not? Would you like to stay here, Sandi?" Martha saw that as an opportunity for Clark to spend more time with girls his age, rather than with that sexy bald billionaire (Was she thinking that Lex was sexy? Oh, well, he was, there's no point in denying it.)

"That'd be awesome!" Clark realized that that was a pathetic attempt of Lex to sound like a 15-year-old girl.

"It'll be fun to have some company here. You know? My husband is out of town too."

"Really?" Clark saw the relief in Sandi's eyes. His father wouldn't allow this, not to say what he would do if he found out the truth, that Sandi was really Lex.

They spent the afternoon in the barn.

"So... you're a girl."

"Yes, Clark, I think we've already stated that."

"What does it feel like?"

"I don't know, more... relaxed?" She smiled.

"What else?"

"Hairy, never thought a woman could be this hairy."

She raised her right foot to the height of Clark's shoulders and pulled up the sleeve of his jogging pants. Clark passed his hand through Sandi's leg and felt the soft little hairs tickling him.

"You can shave that if you want to." Sandi's leg made a loud sound as it landed on the floor.

"Clark!" she recriminated him, "Do I have to remind you that I don't plan to keep this body?"

Lex. With hair. With brown hair.

"Didn't you tell me you used to have red hair?"

"Yes, Clark. And I used to have a penis too."

They chuckled for a moment, but then, both their faces turned extremely serious.

"You're so beautiful."

"I am not!"

"Yes, you are."

Clark leaned his head towards Sandi, slowly, never breaking the eye contact.

"Clark, do you know who I am? Are you sure of what you're doing?"

"Yes, and yes."

They kissed softly, both of their mouths just getting to know each other. Clark's hands caressing Sandi's back, slightly pulling her sweatshirt upwards. They parted for a moment, and Clark could see the worry in Lex's eyes. For a brief moment, he thought he ruined it, he completely and stupidly ruined everything.

"This is going to sound stupid..." her face exploded with a tiny nervous chuckle, "but I don't want to get pregnant."

Clark's face regained its color. "What happened with your plans of not keeping the body?" Clark's hand went softly from her face to her chest and rested on her waist, trying to comfort her.

"They got momentarily replaced by lots of fear."

"Are you seriously afraid?"

"Hello! I've never been a woman before!"

Clark couldn't help laughing through his nose.

"Do you have some condoms somewhere here in this barn or not?"

Wow, she sounded impatient. "Yes, I'll go find them, you wait here."

"I'm not going anywhere."

The next morning, Clark woke up with a girl in his arms. It took him a brief moment that seemed to last forever, to remember the happenings of the previous day. He slept with his best friend. His male best friend. Who was incidentally in a women's body. And he failed him. He couldn't stay awake to help him find his shooting star. He couldn't keep his promise that everything would be returning to normal. His best friend was still a woman. This was going to be a weird Sunday.

She woke up, looked at herself, and looked at Clark. "Hi."

"Hi," he said. "I'm sorry I fell asleep last night. Did you manage to find another shooting star?"

"I did, and I made my wish, but you can see that nothing happened."

"Don't worry, we'll try again tonight." Clark was worrying himself. This was not right. She was acting distant, curt. "Come on, let's have some breakfast."

At the kitchen table, the meal took place between awkward pauses and monosyllables. You didn't have to be a genius to realize what happened between the two kids. Martha saw this, and she was worried, so she managed to split the teen couple for a moment, to have a talk alone with Clark.

"Clark, did you and Sandi--?"

"Mom!" He stopped her with a scream. The least he wanted to do was to discuss this with his mother.

"Well, were you careful?"

"Yes, mom, don't worry about that."

"Then, what's the problem?"

"I don't know, she seems..." Clark lifted his shoulders. Come to think about it, he didn't know what exactly the problem was. "Are you two going to be OK?"

"I think we'll work it out."

"Clark, if you ever need to talk to me--"

"I know."

When Clark finished his chores, he looked for Sandi, and found her in front of the TV, eating some chips and watching MTV, as if nothing else in the world mattered.

"We need to talk," Clark said while turning off the TV.

"Is this about --"

"Last night? Yes. I'm sorry I fell asleep, but I'm not sorry of what happened before."

"You mean, your hyperactive teenager's hormones saw a girl, and you took advantage of the fact that I was alone in the world and vulnerable to get into my pants. And there was the thing where you thought that since I was returning to normal after, I would consider it a wacky mark in my experimentation belt?"

Clark's face turned white. "WHAT??? That is not what happened!"

There was some kind of relief in her face, under a lot of worry, and she looked like she was about to cry. "So please, please, explain it to me, 'cos I have no idea!"

"Maybe it was stupid from my part to make my move when you were *a woman*, but I can assure you that that wasn't the reason. I really like you, Lex. I always did. I just never thought you may like me back 'til just now." They both smiled. "Maybe those girly eyes of yours are more transparent than those serious businessman eyes you had before..." Clark kept talking, not letting her open her mouth "... and that I'm sure you'll have back soon enough."

She closed her eyes and breathed, just breathed, and Clark knew that everything was going to be OK. "I do like you, Clark, I'm sorry of what I said before."

"So you made a wish, and you turned into a girl. Last night you wished to turn back to normal, and nothing happened. I think that it will happen, you don't need to make the wish again; we just have to wait."

"Clark, what if I don't want to return to normal? What if I want to stay like this?"

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

"Well, I don't get to be my father's son, I don't get to run that plant, I don't get to be the center of the hate in this town, and I can be with you."

"Very funny."

"I'm serious."

Clark decided to play along, to see where this was going "Won't you miss your cars, your money, your life?"

"No."

"I don't believe you."

"Well, I may miss my Lamborghini."

Clark shook his head; this was getting on his nerves. "Come on, Lex, do you really wanna be stuck in a girl's body? You know, I kinda liked the idea of being gay."

She laughed, and her face lightened up. "Really? But if I stay like this I get to be with you without having to worry if I get thrown in jail for it."

"I can't believe we're having this conversation!" Clark couldn't help raising the tone of his voice. "You didn't need to be a woman to be with me and you know it!"

"No, I didn't know it!" she yelled back. "If I did, I wouldn't have wished to be a woman so I could be with you!"

"You WHAT?"

"Yes, Clark, that was actually what I wished." That was interesting, Clark thought.

"It didn't occurred to me that you might be gay too, since you're always going on and on about the girls you like," she finished.

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry about that. I was just doing it as an excuse to talk to you." Clark used his best puppy eyes when he realized that all of this was partially his fault.

"So, do you still want to stay like that?"

"I guess not."

Clark laid one hand on the back of Sandi's neck, and the other on her waist. "You already wished to turn back to normal, now mean it."

They approached each other to share a kiss, as Lex said very quietly "I wish I was normal again." It was the sweetest kiss in the world, or at least Clark felt like it was. It seemed like they could be kissing like that forever, and it was easy for them both to not notice what was going on.

When they parted, Clark couldn't help hold a smile. A weird smile.

"What?" Lex said.

"You're 'you' again."

He ran his hand through his scalp.

"And there goes my hair." He seemed disappointed about that.

"What? I like your head better when it's bald and shiny!"

Lex grinned like Clark had never seen before. He could see all of his perfect white teeth. "Shiny", he repeated, almost to himself.

"So, you're a real boy now, Pinocchio, what do you plan to do about that?"

"I plan..." he plunged into the couch, lying down on his back, his feet on the armrest "...to stay here..." he grabbed the remote and turned the TV back on "... keep watching that interesting MTV..." he returned the remote to its place and grabbed the bag of potato chips "... and eat some chips with my boy." He shifted himself to leave some space on the couch and he patted the empty spot. "Are you coming?"

How could he resist that invitation? Just a moment later, his head was on Lex's shoulder, while Lex's arm was around him, both looking at the screen but not really paying attention.

"I think my mom is really going to miss Sandi."

"I think I'll miss her too."

FIN

"I need to talk to Clark"

"Who are you?"

"I'm L... Lex's cousin... Sandi"

"I didn't know Lex had cousins"

"I'm a distant cousin." Sandi seemed nervous "May I speak to Clark, please?"

"He's right there"

Clark was intrigued, who was this mysterious woman?

"Hi" said Clark.

"Um... Clark, can we go somewhere private?"

"Sure, follow me"

Sandi followed Clark to the barn, where they sat on some hay bales. There was something odd with her clothes, they seemed... well... big.

"So... did Lex told you to talk to me? Why?"

"Clark, I'm..." She just looked down and sighed.

"What?" Clark looked puzzled.

"You're never going to believe me", she said.

Clark laughed at that. "Try me"

"Clark, I'm not Lex's cousin, I'm Lex"

That just didn't make sense at all. "Ehhh?" Clark puffed, since the words weren't forming in his head.

"Just... I don't know... something happened to me."

No, this couldn't be."This can't be... is this some sort of joke? Did Lex put you on to this?"

The girl sighed loudly. "It's not a joke, nobody put me on to this and I don't know what to do"

"So you're Lex..."

"Yeah"

"...but you look like a 15-year-old girl"

"Yes"

"May I ask why?"

"How could I know?"

"Well, I wasn't there when it happened, you did, so just tell me the story already"

"There is no story. I just woke up this way.

"Something must've happened--"

"You think?"

Ouch, an acid remark that Clark let slide, just trying to move on.

"Well, what did you do yesterday, then?"

"I know what are you asking, but no, I wasn't around any meteor rocks, but --"

She stopped talking, and her eyes were looking straight to the floor.

"But what? If you don't tell me, then I can't help you." Clark touched her chin lightly, and she made eye contact again.

"I kind of... made a wish."

"A --" Clark couldn't hold back a laugh, "A wish? Why did you make a wish?"

"Well, there was this shooting star and I just, you know, made a wish. For the heck of it. I didn't actually believe that it was going to come true, I'm a scientist, you know."

"And you wished this?"

"Dammit, Clark, you're not helping me at all!"

"So, what did you wish, then?"

"To be someone else," she said with a lot of conviction in her voice. "I just wanted --" her eyes turned teary and her voice broke "-- to be someone else."

Clark didn't know what to do, this was... weirder than weird. "Be careful of what you wish for" Clark said to himself, but the words came out of his mouth very softly. "We'll find a way to get you back to normal, I promise" Didn't his father used to say something about making promises that you can't keep?

She shook her head in disbelief, looked at him, and grimaced in a way that Clark recognized as Lex's. He took his time to look at this person, it was and it was not Lex at the same time. She had Lex's eyes, but that was about it. Now that he knew what he was dealing with, he recognized the oversized sweatshirt and jogging pants the girl was wearing: they were Lex's. She had brown hair 'til her shoulders, her eyebrows were not plucked, yet that didn't matter because they were framing her face in a nice way, she wasn't wearing make up for the obvious reasons, and the freshness of the face and the fullness of the lips almost made Clark forget what he was doing. What was he doing? Right, trying to help Lex. "So, if it happened once, it can happen twice. Tonight we'll watch the sky, find another shooting star and you'll wish to get back to normal, and problem solved." It sounded as an order."First of all, today's Saturday, so nobody will miss you until Monday, there's no problem there."

"What if I'm still like this on Monday?"

"You won't." Why? Why was he so sure? He couldn't explain that to himself. "Come on, we'll make up a stupid story so my mom will let you spend the weekend here". He thought about telling his mother the truth, as he always did, but he felt like he had to protect Lex. He chose him to confide this, but he was sure that Lex wouldn't let anyone else in it. Maybe this would be over too soon to even worry about it.

"Like what?"

"I heard you telling her your name was Sandi, right?"

"Yes, that's... that's another short form for Alexander, I guess I'm not that creative."

"I like it. So... you're Lex's cousin, and you came to visit from... let's say Chicago. You met with Lex who had to leave town for some sort of business emergency, told you to spend the weekend in the Castle anyway, and to talk to me if you needed anything, but you don't wanna stay in that huge castle all by yourself.

" She nodded. "I can handle that story."

In the kitchen, Clark announced that Sandi was staying for lunch; Martha didn't seem to have a problem with that." Clark, did you know that Lex had a cousin?"

Fortunately, Lex jumped in and answered the question: "He didn't mention me? I met Clark briefly at Lex's castle once." Maybe that way, Clark's mom wouldn't think he was hanging with a total stranger.

"So, Sandi, what brings you to Smallville on this particular occasion?"

"I came to spend the weekend with Lex, but that won't be happening."

"What? Why?"

"Lex had some emergency meeting who knows where. Now I'm stuck here, and I'll have to spend the whole weekend alone."

"Alone in that creepy castle?"

"Creepy?" Sandi was hurt by that comment, but Clark saw the idea forming in her eyes. "Yes, you could say that the Castle is creepy, and the servants..." she shuddered "...there's that Enrique guy who's always sucking those lollipops... yes, creepy is the word." She calmly took a sip of her glass. "I love Smallville, but I wish I could spend my weekend anywhere but in that castle."

"Hey, why don't you crash here?" that was Clark's best attempt of sounding spontaneous. "Can she, mom?"

"Sure, why not? Would you like to stay here, Sandi?" Martha saw that as an opportunity for Clark to spend more time with girls his age, rather than with that sexy bald billionaire (Was she thinking that Lex was sexy? Oh, well, he was, there's no point in denying it)

"That'd be awesome!" Clark realized that that was a pathetic attempt of Lex to sound like a 15-year-old girl.

"It'll be fun to have some company here. You know? My husband is out of town too."

"Really?" Clark saw the relief in Sandi's eyes. His father wouldn't allow this, not to say what he would do if he found out the truth, that Sandi was really Lex.

They spent the afternoon in the barn.

"So... you're a girl."

"Yes, Clark, I think we've already stated that."

"What does it feel like?"

"I don't know, more... relaxed?" She smiled.

"What else?"

"Hairy, never thought a woman could be this hairy."

She raised her right foot to the height of Clark's shoulders and pulled up the sleeve of his jogging pants. Clark passed his hand trough Sandi's leg and felt the soft little hairs tickling him.

"You can shave that if you want to." Sandi's leg made a loud sound as it landed on the floor.

"Clark!" she recriminated him, "Do I have to remind you that I don't plan to keep this body?"

Lex. With hair. With brown hair.

"Didn't you tell me you used to have red hair?"

"Yes, Clark. And I used to have a penis too."

They chuckled for a moment, but then, both their faces turned extremely serious.

"You're so beautiful."

"I am not!"

"Yes, you are."

Clark leaned his head towards Sandi, slowly, never breaking the eye contact.

"Clark, do you know who I am? Are you sure of what you're doing?"

"Yes, and yes."

They kissed softly, both of their mouths just getting to know each other. Clark's hands caressing Sandi's back, slightly pulling her sweatshirt upwards. They parted for a moment, and Clark could see the worry in Lex's eyes. For a brief moment, he thought he ruined it, he completely and stupidly ruined everything.

"This is going to sound stupid..." her face exploded with a tiny nervous chuckle, "but I don't want to get pregnant."

Clark's face regained its color. "What happened with your plans of not keeping the body?" Clark's hand went softly from her face to her chest and rested on her waist, trying to comfort her.

"They got momentarily replaced by lots of fear."

"Are you seriously afraid?"

"Hello! I've never been a woman before!"

Clark couldn't help laughing through his nose.

"Do you have some condoms somewhere here in this barn or not?"

Wow, she sounded impatient. "Yes, I'll go find them, you wait here."

"I'm not going anywhere."

The next morning, Clark woke up with a girl in his arms. It took him a brief moment that seemed to last forever, to remember the happenings of the previous day. He slept with his best friend. His male best friend. Who was incidentally in a women's body. And he failed him. He couldn't stay awake to help him find his shooting star. He couldn't keep his promise that everything would be returning to normal. His best friend was still a woman. This was going to be a weird Sunday.

She woke up, looked at herself, and looked at Clark. "Hi." "Hi," he said. "I'm sorry I fell asleep last night. Did you manage to find another shooting star?"

"I did, and I made my wish, but you can see that nothing happened."

"Don't worry, we'll try again tonight." Clark was worrying himself. This was not right. She was acting distant, curt. "Come on, let's have some breakfast."

At the kitchen table, the meal took place between awkward pauses and monosyllables. You didn't have to be a genius to realize what happened between the two kids. Martha saw this, and she was worried, so she managed to split the teen couple for a moment, to have a talk alone with Clark.

"Clark, did you and Sandi--?"

"Mom!" He stopped her with a scream. The least he wanted to do was to discuss this with his mother.

"Well, were you careful?"

"Yes, mom, don't worry about that."

"Then, what's the problem?"

"I don't know, she seems..." Clark lifted his shoulders. Come to think about it, he didn't know what exactly the problem was. "Are you two going to be OK?"

"I think we'll work it out."

"Clark, if you ever need to talk to me--"

"I know."

When Clark finished his chores, he looked for Sandi, and found her in front of the TV, eating some chips and watching MTV, as if nothing else in the world mattered.

"We need to talk" Clark said, while turning off the TV.

"Is this about --"

"Last night? Yes. I'm sorry I fell asleep, but I'm not sorry of what happened before."

"You mean, your hyperactive teenager's hormones saw a girl, and you took advantage of the fact that I was alone in the world and vulnerable to get into my pants. And there was the thing where you thought that since I was returning to normal after, I would consider it a wacky mark in my experimentation belt?"

Clark's face turned white. "WHAT??? That is not what happened!"

There was some kind of relief in her face, under a lot of worry, and she looked like she was about to cry. "So please, please, explain it to me, 'cos I have no idea!"

"Maybe it was stupid from my part to make my move when you were *a woman*, but I can assure you that that wasn't the reason. I really like you, Lex. I always did. I just never thought you may like me back 'til just now." They both smiled. "Maybe those girly eyes of yours are more transparent than those serious businessman eyes you had before..." Clark kept talking, not letting her open her mouth "... and that I'm sure you'll have back soon enough.

She closed her eyes and breathed, just breathed, and Clark knew that everything was going to be OK. "I do like you, Clark, I'm sorry of what I said before.

"So you made a wish, and you turned into a girl. Last night you wished to turn back to normal, and nothing happened. I think that it will happen, you don't need to make the wish again; we just have to wait.

"Clark, what if I don't want to return to normal? What if I want to stay like this?"

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

"Well, I don't get to be my father's son, I don't get to run that plant, I don't get to be the center of the hate in this town, and I can be with you.

"Very funny."

"I'm serious."

Clark decided to play along, to see where this was going "Won't you miss your cars, your money, your life?"

"No."

"I don't believe you."

"Well, I may miss my Lamborghini."

Clark shook his head; this was getting on his nerves. "Come on, Lex, do you really wanna be stuck in a girl's body? You know, I kinda liked the idea of being gay."

She laughed, and her face lightened up. "Really? But if I stay like this I get to be with you without having to worry if I get thrown in jail for it."

"I can't believe we're having this conversation!" Clark couldn't help raising the tone of his voice. "You didn't need to be a woman to be with me and you know it!"

"No, I didn't know it!" she yelled back. "If I did, I wouldn't have wished to be a woman so I could be with you!"

"You WHAT?"

"Yes, Clark, that was actually what I wished." That was interesting, Clark thought. "It didn't occurred to me that you might be gay too, since you're always going on and on about the girls you like," she finished.

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry about that. I was just doing it as an excuse to talk to you." Clark used his best puppy eyes when he realized that all of this was partially his fault.

"So, do you still want to stay like that?"

"I guess not."

Clark laid one hand on the back of Sandi's neck, and the other on her waist. "You already wished to turn back to normal, now mean it." They approached each other to share a kiss, as Lex said very quietly "I wish I was normal again." It was the sweetest kiss in the world, or at least Clark felt like it was. It seemed like they could be kissing like that forever, and it was easy for them both to not notice what was going on.

When they parted, Clark couldn't hold a smile. A weird smile.

"What?" Lex said.

"You're 'you' again."

He ran his hand through his scalp.

"And there goes my hair." He seemed disappointed about that.

"What? I like your head better when it's bald and shiny!"

Lex grinned like Clark had never seen before. He could see all of his perfect white teeth. "Shiny", he repeated, almost to himself.

"So, you're a real boy now, Pinocchio, what do you plan to do about that?"

"I plan..." he plunged into the couch, lying down on his back, his feet on the armrest "...to stay here..." he grabbed the remote and turned the TV back on "... keep watching that interesting MTV..." he returned the remote to its place and grabbed the bag of potato chips "... and eat some chips with my boy." He shifted himself to leave some space on the couch and he patted the empty spot. "Are you coming?"

How could he resist that invitation? Just a moment later, his head was on Lex's shoulder, while Lex's arm was around him, both looking at the screen but not really paying attention.

"I think my mom is really going to miss Sandi."

"I think I'll miss her too."

FIN

"I need to talk to Clark"

"Who are you?"

"I'm L... Lex's cousin... Sandi"

"I didn't know Lex had cousins"

"I'm a distant cousin." Sandi seemed nervous "May I speak to Clark, please?"

"He's right there"

Clark was intrigued, who was this mysterious woman?

"Hi" said Clark.

"Um... Clark, can we go somewhere private?"

"Sure, follow me"

Sandi followed Clark to the barn, where they sat on some hay bales. There was something odd with her clothes, they seemed... well... big.

"So... did Lex told you to talk to me? Why?"

"Clark, I'm..." She just looked down and sighed.

"What?" Clark looked puzzled.

"You're never going to believe me", she said.

Clark laughed at that. "Try me"

"Clark, I'm not Lex's cousin, I'm Lex"

That just didn't make sense at all. "Ehhh?" Clark puffed, since the words weren't forming in his head.

"Just... I don't know... something happened to me."

No, this couldn't be."This can't be... is this some sort of joke? Did Lex put you on to this?"

The girl sighed loudly. "It's not a joke, nobody put me on to this and I don't know what to do"

"So you're Lex..."

"Yeah"

"...but you look like a 15-year-old girl"

"Yes"

"May I ask why?"

"How could I know?"

"Well, I wasn't there when it happened, you did, so just tell me the story already"

"There is no story. I just woke up this way.

"Something must've happened--"

"You think?"

Ouch, an acid remark that Clark let slide, just trying to move on.

"Well, what did you do yesterday, then?"

"I know what are you asking, but no, I wasn't around any meteor rocks, but --"

She stopped talking, and her eyes were looking straight to the floor.

"But what? If you don't tell me, then I can't help you." Clark touched her chin lightly, and she made eye contact again.

"I kind of... made a wish."

"A --" Clark couldn't hold back a laugh, "A wish? Why did you make a wish?"

"Well, there was this shooting star and I just, you know, made a wish. For the heck of it. I didn't actually believe that it was going to come true, I'm a scientist, you know."

"And you wished this?"

"Dammit, Clark, you're not helping me at all!"

"So, what did you wish, then?"

"To be someone else," she said with a lot of conviction in her voice. "I just wanted --" her eyes turned teary and her voice broke "-- to be someone else."

Clark didn't know what to do, this was... weirder than weird. "Be careful of what you wish for" Clark said to himself, but the words came out of his mouth very softly. "We'll find a way to get you back to normal, I promise" Didn't his father used to say something about making promises that you can't keep?

She shook her head in disbelief, looked at him, and grimaced in a way that Clark recognized as Lex's. He took his time to look at this person, it was and it was not Lex at the same time. She had Lex's eyes, but that was about it. Now that he knew what he was dealing with, he recognized the oversized sweatshirt and jogging pants the girl was wearing: they were Lex's. She had brown hair 'til her shoulders, her eyebrows were not plucked, yet that didn't matter because they were framing her face in a nice way, she wasn't wearing make up for the obvious reasons, and the freshness of the face and the fullness of the lips almost made Clark forget what he was doing. What was he doing? Right, trying to help Lex. "So, if it happened once, it can happen twice. Tonight we'll watch the sky, find another shooting star and you'll wish to get back to normal, and problem solved." It sounded as an order."First of all, today's Saturday, so nobody will miss you until Monday, there's no problem there."

"What if I'm still like this on Monday?"

"You won't." Why? Why was he so sure? He couldn't explain that to himself. "Come on, we'll make up a stupid story so my mom will let you spend the weekend here". He thought about telling his mother the truth, as he always did, but he felt like he had to protect Lex. He chose him to confide this, but he was sure that Lex wouldn't let anyone else in it. Maybe this would be over too soon to even worry about it.

"Like what?"

"I heard you telling her your name was Sandi, right?"

"Yes, that's... that's another short form for Alexander, I guess I'm not that creative."

"I like it. So... you're Lex's cousin, and you came to visit from... let's say Chicago. You met with Lex who had to leave town for some sort of business emergency, told you to spend the weekend in the Castle anyway, and to talk to me if you needed anything, but you don't wanna stay in that huge castle all by yourself.

" She nodded. "I can handle that story."

In the kitchen, Clark announced that Sandi was staying for lunch; Martha didn't seem to have a problem with that." Clark, did you know that Lex had a cousin?"

Fortunately, Lex jumped in and answered the question: "He didn't mention me? I met Clark briefly at Lex's castle once." Maybe that way, Clark's mom wouldn't think he was hanging with a total stranger.

"So, Sandi, what brings you to Smallville on this particular occasion?"

"I came to spend the weekend with Lex, but that won't be happening."

"What? Why?"

"Lex had some emergency meeting who knows where. Now I'm stuck here, and I'll have to spend the whole weekend alone."

"Alone in that creepy castle?"

"Creepy?" Sandi was hurt by that comment, but Clark saw the idea forming in her eyes. "Yes, you could say that the Castle is creepy, and the servants..." she shuddered "...there's that Enrique guy who's always sucking those lollipops... yes, creepy is the word." She calmly took a sip of her glass. "I love Smallville, but I wish I could spend my weekend anywhere but in that castle."

"Hey, why don't you crash here?" that was Clark's best attempt of sounding spontaneous. "Can she, mom?"

"Sure, why not? Would you like to stay here, Sandi?" Martha saw that as an opportunity for Clark to spend more time with girls his age, rather than with that sexy bald billionaire (Was she thinking that Lex was sexy? Oh, well, he was, there's no point in denying it)

"That'd be awesome!" Clark realized that that was a pathetic attempt of Lex to sound like a 15-year-old girl.

"It'll be fun to have some company here. You know? My husband is out of town too."

"Really?" Clark saw the relief in Sandi's eyes. His father wouldn't allow this, not to say what he would do if he found out the truth, that Sandi was really Lex.

They spent the afternoon in the barn.

"So... you're a girl."

"Yes, Clark, I think we've already stated that."

"What does it feel like?"

"I don't know, more... relaxed?" She smiled.

"What else?"

"Hairy, never thought a woman could be this hairy."

She raised her right foot to the height of Clark's shoulders and pulled up the sleeve of his jogging pants. Clark passed his hand trough Sandi's leg and felt the soft little hairs tickling him.

"You can shave that if you want to." Sandi's leg made a loud sound as it landed on the floor.

"Clark!" she recriminated him, "Do I have to remind you that I don't plan to keep this body?"

Lex. With hair. With brown hair.

"Didn't you tell me you used to have red hair?"

"Yes, Clark. And I used to have a penis too."

They chuckled for a moment, but then, both their faces turned extremely serious.

"You're so beautiful."

"I am not!"

"Yes, you are."

Clark leaned his head towards Sandi, slowly, never breaking the eye contact.

"Clark, do you know who I am? Are you sure of what you're doing?"

"Yes, and yes."

They kissed softly, both of their mouths just getting to know each other. Clark's hands caressing Sandi's back, slightly pulling her sweatshirt upwards. They parted for a moment, and Clark could see the worry in Lex's eyes. For a brief moment, he thought he ruined it, he completely and stupidly ruined everything.

"This is going to sound stupid..." her face exploded with a tiny nervous chuckle, "but I don't want to get pregnant."

Clark's face regained its color. "What happened with your plans of not keeping the body?" Clark's hand went softly from her face to her chest and rested on her waist, trying to comfort her.

"They got momentarily replaced by lots of fear."

"Are you seriously afraid?"

"Hello! I've never been a woman before!"

Clark couldn't help laughing through his nose.

"Do you have some condoms somewhere here in this barn or not?"

Wow, she sounded impatient. "Yes, I'll go find them, you wait here."

"I'm not going anywhere."

The next morning, Clark woke up with a girl in his arms. It took him a brief moment that seemed to last forever, to remember the happenings of the previous day. He slept with his best friend. His male best friend. Who was incidentally in a women's body. And he failed him. He couldn't stay awake to help him find his shooting star. He couldn't keep his promise that everything would be returning to normal. His best friend was still a woman. This was going to be a weird Sunday.

She woke up, looked at herself, and looked at Clark. "Hi." "Hi," he said. "I'm sorry I fell asleep last night. Did you manage to find another shooting star?"

"I did, and I made my wish, but you can see that nothing happened."

"Don't worry, we'll try again tonight." Clark was worrying himself. This was not right. She was acting distant, curt. "Come on, let's have some breakfast."

At the kitchen table, the meal took place between awkward pauses and monosyllables. You didn't have to be a genius to realize what happened between the two kids. Martha saw this, and she was worried, so she managed to split the teen couple for a moment, to have a talk alone with Clark.

"Clark, did you and Sandi--?"

"Mom!" He stopped her with a scream. The least he wanted to do was to discuss this with his mother.

"Well, were you careful?"

"Yes, mom, don't worry about that."

"Then, what's the problem?"

"I don't know, she seems..." Clark lifted his shoulders. Come to think about it, he didn't know what exactly the problem was. "Are you two going to be OK?"

"I think we'll work it out."

"Clark, if you ever need to talk to me--"

"I know."

When Clark finished his chores, he looked for Sandi, and found her in front of the TV, eating some chips and watching MTV, as if nothing else in the world mattered.

"We need to talk" Clark said, while turning off the TV.

"Is this about --"

"Last night? Yes. I'm sorry I fell asleep, but I'm not sorry of what happened before."

"You mean, your hyperactive teenager's hormones saw a girl, and you took advantage of the fact that I was alone in the world and vulnerable to get into my pants. And there was the thing where you thought that since I was returning to normal after, I would consider it a wacky mark in my experimentation belt?"

Clark's face turned white. "WHAT??? That is not what happened!"

There was some kind of relief in her face, under a lot of worry, and she looked like she was about to cry. "So please, please, explain it to me, 'cos I have no idea!"

"Maybe it was stupid from my part to make my move when you were *a woman*, but I can assure you that that wasn't the reason. I really like you, Lex. I always did. I just never thought you may like me back 'til just now." They both smiled. "Maybe those girly eyes of yours are more transparent than those serious businessman eyes you had before..." Clark kept talking, not letting her open her mouth "... and that I'm sure you'll have back soon enough.

She closed her eyes and breathed, just breathed, and Clark knew that everything was going to be OK. "I do like you, Clark, I'm sorry of what I said before.

"So you made a wish, and you turned into a girl. Last night you wished to turn back to normal, and nothing happened. I think that it will happen, you don't need to make the wish again; we just have to wait.

"Clark, what if I don't want to return to normal? What if I want to stay like this?"

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

"Well, I don't get to be my father's son, I don't get to run that plant, I don't get to be the center of the hate in this town, and I can be with you.

"Very funny."

"I'm serious."

Clark decided to play along, to see where this was going "Won't you miss your cars, your money, your life?"

"No."

"I don't believe you."

"Well, I may miss my Lamborghini."

Clark shook his head; this was getting on his nerves. "Come on, Lex, do you really wanna be stuck in a girl's body? You know, I kinda liked the idea of being gay."

She laughed, and her face lightened up. "Really? But if I stay like this I get to be with you without having to worry if I get thrown in jail for it."

"I can't believe we're having this conversation!" Clark couldn't help raising the tone of his voice. "You didn't need to be a woman to be with me and you know it!"

"No, I didn't know it!" she yelled back. "If I did, I wouldn't have wished to be a woman so I could be with you!"

"You WHAT?"

"Yes, Clark, that was actually what I wished." That was interesting, Clark thought. "It didn't occurred to me that you might be gay too, since you're always going on and on about the girls you like," she finished.

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry about that. I was just doing it as an excuse to talk to you." Clark used his best puppy eyes when he realized that all of this was partially his fault.

"So, do you still want to stay like that?"

"I guess not."

Clark laid one hand on the back of Sandi's neck, and the other on her waist. "You already wished to turn back to normal, now mean it." They approached each other to share a kiss, as Lex said very quietly "I wish I was normal again." It was the sweetest kiss in the world, or at least Clark felt like it was. It seemed like they could be kissing like that forever, and it was easy for them both to not notice what was going on.

When they parted, Clark couldn't hold a smile. A weird smile.

"What?" Lex said.

"You're 'you' again."

He ran his hand through his scalp.

"And there goes my hair." He seemed disappointed about that.

"What? I like your head better when it's bald and shiny!"

Lex grinned like Clark had never seen before. He could see all of his perfect white teeth. "Shiny", he repeated, almost to himself.

"So, you're a real boy now, Pinocchio, what do you plan to do about that?"

"I plan..." he plunged into the couch, lying down on his back, his feet on the armrest "...to stay here..." he grabbed the remote and turned the TV back on "... keep watching that interesting MTV..." he returned the remote to its place and grabbed the bag of potato chips "... and eat some chips with my boy." He shifted himself to leave some space on the couch and he patted the empty spot. "Are you coming?"

How could he resist that invitation? Just a moment later, his head was on Lex's shoulder, while Lex's arm was around him, both looking at the screen but not really paying attention.

"I think my mom is really going to miss Sandi."

"I think I'll miss her too."

FIN